Hey there remember me? 

Hey there long time no see right? You all probably thought I forgot about you guys right? Nope! Life just has hit hard lately so I probably should catch you all up on our life right?

First off we adopted a doggy! 

Yep that’s her and all her puppy cuteness! She’s about 11 weeks old right now and we got her at about 8 weeks. Her name is Rory (you all know I gotta get my Gilmore Girls in there somehow!) and we are pretty sure she’s a lab/pit mix. She’s the sweetest little thing. 
Next off obviously we have been Christmas shopping. The kids are completely done. Santa did good this year. Not to toot his own horn or anything. 😉 Also why the heck do they make baby dolls that poop and pee? Elli asked for one (Santa may of gotten her one. Haha) but these things are so expensive and if you wanna change a diaper kid Nora wouldn’t mind you changing hers and it won’t cost Santa anything. haha 

Shopping for Nora was hard this year because she’s not into very much yet except animals really and dress up. She’s in love with dressing up. (Santa may of gotten her that as well. haha) Elli asked Santa for so much he had a hard time picking. 
We did secret Santa with my family and I got my sister in law. I can’t really say what I got her because honestly I have no idea if she reads my blogs. Is she does then she knows I have her name now. haha 
On a more serious note I have been really struggling with anxiety lately. Like to the point that I was put on Lexapro (sp?) and it had been helping a lot. But the last few days I’ve gotten to where I have at least one bad panic attack every evening. I’ve had worse obviously but these are different from any other panic attacks I’ve ever had. I shake, I hyperventilate, I can’t breathe, I don’t wanna be touched, I feel like I’m falling apart. I’m used to most of that but I’ve never been like don’t touch me. Usually I just want someone to hug me and make me feel like everything is okay. These if anyone touches me I just feel like I can’t move and I’m just repulsed by anyone even near me. 

Hopefully making a doctors appointment soon to get all this figured out. I hate having an anxiety disorder that I can’t control. It makes me feel like a failure. And it’s something I can’t help. I know that. But I desperately wanna feel normal. 
I’ll update you all more in a few days. I promise after the holidays I should be back on a normal blogging schedule. And as always stay beautiful. 

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